Tears, Regrets, & Bittersweet Memories
by Saki Toyo
Summary: Written from Rukia's POV. In the last few minutes before she was arrested and taken to the Soul Society, she had a a million thoughts running through her mind.


DISCLAIMER: I do not own Bleach. Unfortunately...D; If I did, I would be a Soul Reaper too.

This is written from Rukia's POV. It's her thoughts before she left Ichigo to go to the Soul Society because she was arrested.

I'm not sure what I was doing with the italics...but it seems better this way, so I kept them.

Ah, enough of my ranting. Please enjoy! ^-^

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**Tears, Regrets, and Bittersweet Memories**

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_I'm sorry._

_Ichigo._

_I'm sorry._

He was lying on the ground, a pool of blood forming around him. Struggling to get up, he groaned. Groaned, but never whimpered or complained. He never gave in to the pain that his wounds must give him. He never even hinted that he was about to stop fighting for me.

Fighting…for me, the girl who he just met four weeks ago. The girl who, if he was never attacked by Hollows, could have – would have never met him. The girl who changed his life.

_Sometimes I wonder…would it have been better if I had never turned you into a Soul Reaper? If I had just taken care of that Hollow myself, you never would have been dragged into this mess. You wouldn't have to fight for me. I wouldn't have been punished and ordered back to the Soul Society. You wouldn't have run after me tonight. This whole mess could've been avoided. You could've lived a normal life._

She glanced at him, keeping a blank expression on her face. Covered in blood, and still trying to get up. Why did he have to come after her? She left a note. Was she that important?

_He's about to die…and it's my fault_.

He tried to get up once more, and almost made it. But then his strength gave out, and he fell down again. She watched as he grimaced in pain.

It was agonizing just looking at him.

Her gaze turned to Byakuya as he spoke, telling Ichigo to give up, that he'd never make it anyways. His uniform was painted in red – Ichigo's blood – but his air of power never left him. He didn't seem to care that he had, if nothing else, killed the poor boy.

"You put up a good fight," admitted the head of the Kuchiki family. "But in the end, you were no match for me. If you keep still, you'll be able to live for a few more minutes."

The blood-stained soul reaper didn't say anything. He simply glared at the Captain. Then he fixed his eyes on Rukia. What she saw in them was not hatred; but forgiveness and regret. She faltered, her expression giving away the angst and horror she was feeling that whole time. She quickly recovered, replacing her strong emotions with the expressionless mask she wore so diligently.

_You idiot…you didn't have to follow me. Now you're going to die._

He frowned, making her feel a pang in her heart. She could see that he was still determined to get her back. But he had no more strength left. In just a couple of minutes, he would die.

_He looks so pitiful in that state. Yet he's been so heroic. I want to go there, to comfort him. I want to save him. But…I can't. It's not possible. Besides…I've already caused him enough trouble. There's no need for me to be in his life anymore, even if it's his only for his last moments in this world. I don't deserve it._

She turned away from his unmoving body. Byakuya nodded in her direction, indicating that it was time to depart. Blinking back tears, she walked towards the huge gate that had appeared – the gate to the Soul Society.

_I'll miss you, Ichigo._

She turned back to look at him one last time. His body lay still in the pool of blood. It was almost a beautiful scene.

"Rukia," prodded Byakuya.

Whirling around, she closed her eyes and followed Byakuya. As the doors to the gate closed, she heard a voice. It was so quiet that she almost missed it, but it was undoubtedly _his._

"R-Rukia…I'm sorry…"

She gasped, images of the past four weeks flooded into her mind. All of her memories of the fun times she had raced past her eyes. Sitting on the roof eating lunch, joking around in class, walking home together… Everyone was there: Orihime, Uryu, Chad, and of course…Ichigo.

She blinked back overwhelming tears.

_I had so much fun with them._

She choked back a sob.

_I'll never see any of them ever again._

Tears ran down her cheeks.

_These past four weeks have been the best of my life._

As soon as she walked through the gate, Rukia started crying. Her sobs echoed in the cold night. Her knees gave out, and she fell down, tears streaking her face and dotting her uniform. She sobbed uncontrollably, the pain of leaving Karakura town too hard to bear. She only had one thought running through her mind.

_I loved it there._

The doors closed with a bang.

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A/N: Ah, well what do you think? I was listening to Moments by Ayumi Hamasaki while writing this, but I actually got the idea when I was listening to "If We Ever Meet Again ft. Timbaland" by Katy Perry. It was actually supposed to end with Rukia saying "I'll never be the same if we ever meet again". (Yup, taken directly from the song) But then…I couldn't find a way to make it like that…so it ended up different. It's sort of a cliffhanger, isn't it?

I'll admit, I'm pretty depressed right now. Since I'm probably not going to see a lot of my friends ever again...So, that's also why I wrote this.  
...*depressing mood*

Yeah...Anyways! Once again, it's four in the morning! I seem to do my work at night…or, err, early morning. Very early… Ah, time to get some sleep. T_T

Right! So...read and review! Tell me if you'd rather it end the way I originally intended it to, or if you liked the ending I came up with instead! Any advice is very welcome!

Thanks for reading it! Hope you enjoyed!


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